It's not that I want to go home, absolutely not. I still maintain that I could live here very happily. I love the ways of thinking here - people aren't so incredibly prudish and afraid of everything like back home. I think that's going to annoy me when I do go back. But I'm tired of the situation I'm in now - paying way too much for a crappy apartment which I can't afford, not being able to work, not having any books with me, not having a car... the list goes on. I'll be glad to be back - to go to camp, to work, to eat enchiladas and 'my' macaroni, to be able to wear shorts and flipflops, to feel the sun, to drive with the music cranked up, to buy cheap Target clothes and not have to worry about warmth or about fitting them into a suitcase. But I'm going to miss all the people I've gotten close to here, and I'm definitely going to miss the attitudes and such. And the healthy food - everything tasted funny when I went home in January and I'm not looking forward to that plastic-y, fatty taste. But really, if we could combine the people of the Netherlands with the land and resources of America, we'd have a great country. The Dutch never should have given up New York.